i need a new name for it... frustrated with a person in my cell group, it was named
but i want to change it now. anybody got any suggestion of user name that is not taken up already?
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i'm very frustrated with things the way in my life. i dont think i am even spiritually mature enough to join any ministry, since i am rejected by all the ministries that im interested in (i.e. city news, drama, costume and makeup) i don't even know whether water baptism would be a good thing for me. it's like marriage, it's particularly humiliating when you get a divorce.
i'm not happy.
i'm not happy if someone gives me a stab and says that i take things too personal, and not expect me to not take things personal after the whole thing. i'm not happy with people using words carelessly because they hurt. it makes me want to stoop to their level and come up with some wise-ass status update and talk about how holy or fun i think i am on my blog.
it's not me to shut up and not talk about it.
it's just not me.........!!!!!! i am very resentful and extremely sorry for myself. i want to fight back like i always do, beat the adversary up to a pulp and cast them off far far away like they are the team rockets.
why is it that people never find themselves in conflict? they hold their tongue and that's it? wouldnt biting their own tongue hurt? or they just love them for who they are-give them the other cheek to slap-isnt that dumb? or they're satisfied with the level of friendship and not wish to take it further?
i will ignore all the horrible people in my life and let them be, live on pretense. i'll never want a deeper friendship because maybe i am shallo just like that.
my life sucks.
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